The following was taken from an AIM conversation I had with a close
friend...

In my trig/precalc class for the past few days, the teacher 
has been reminding us about the poor kids wanting their cd players, 
stereos, and other assorted things.

you know, pretty typical at christmas

well I got to thinking...

why do dejectedly poor children always write to these 
foundations always asking for 
stuff that's completely unimportant when compared to how 
much FOOD, SHELTER, or CLOTHING would help their family out?

so I thought some more

since they always want stuff that could serve them utterly 
no purpose in their given situation except for a couple hours 
of laughs, I would get them the most useless thing that is to 
be found on this miserable Earth that I could think of...

so I signed up to bring them one of those little rubber tubes 
filled with water that turn inside out and fall out of your 
hand when you try to hold them. 

Merry Christmas!